Meet #013: The Condado Bad Boy
It's October 13th. I've been waiting all month to post this one on the 13th, so let me have my moment. 😭
Out of 100 belugas, 98 came out of the generator I vibe-coded. Two are hand-curated: #000, the gift for CZ, and this guy.
#013 is mine. And he is NOT humble.
The tale of the tape
- Name: The Condado Bad Boy
- Hometown: Condado Beach, San Juan, Puerto Rico 🇵🇷
- Gear: red boxing gloves, gold chain, shades
- Palette: Arctic Pearl (white-hot, like his confidence)
- Pose: Rising. Expression: Grin. Extra: Sparkles. Obviously.
- Record: undefeated against the waves (the waves have not been informed)
- Status: hand-curated 1/1, one of the Founder Invites, not for sale
Some fun math from the trait sheet: Condado Beach is a background that shows up exactly once in the whole pod. He's the only boxer out of 100. And he wears the only gold chain. Nobody else gets the chain. That's not rarity-tier talk (there are no rarity tiers, every beluga is a 1/1). That's just him being him.
Condado Beach
Every other beluga lives in a glowing ocean world: kelp forests, ice shelves, crystal caves, a starfield abyss. Cold water, neon light.
#013 said nah. 😭
He swam south, found turquoise water, palm trees, hotels lined up along the sand and a Puerto Rican flag snapping in the breeze, and decided this was his training camp. Every morning he's out there at the waterline shadowboxing the surf. Jab, jab, cross. The waves keep coming back. So does he.
Belugas are Arctic animals, so yes, a beluga living his best life in San Juan is ridiculous. That's the point. He's not where he's "supposed" to be. He showed up anyway.
The gloves
The red gloves are the whole story.
In November 2025 I got rugged down to .012 SOL. That's the punch you don't see coming. You're on the canvas, the ref is counting, and the bell doesn't care how you feel about it.
The gloves are for getting up. Not for revenge, not for picking fights with real people. Just for putting your hands back up and taking the next round.
He's basically me with better cardio. Got rugged, still building. #013 is what that feels like with gloves on.
Fight night (trash talk edition)
Every good boxer needs a press conference. #013 has made his whole personality a press conference.
In the cartoon edition he's at the podium for Big Belugas Fight Night: navy suit, gold chain, shades indoors (of course), mics from Ocean Sports and Deep Sea News lined up, pointing straight at the camera with the championship belt sitting next to him like it's already his.
His opponents are never people. They're the stuff that tried to take me out. Some of his greatest hits:
- "The bear market has a glass jaw. I've seen it. I've been it."
- "Red candle? I wear red. On my hands. Different energy."
- "You rugged me down to .012 and thought I'd stay down? I'm a beluga. I float." 😭
- "Gas fees can't hit what they can't catch."
- "The tide comes in twice a day. So do I. Ask it how that's going."
- "Jellyfish talk a lot of smack for something with no brain."
Playful, loud, zero real names. He's an original character and so are all his opponents. The trenches are the villain. Not a person.
Manifesting destiny, victory and success
#013 says it out loud every morning, whether anybody's listening or not: destiny, victory, success.
That's not a flex, that's a practice. You say the thing before it's true, and then you do the boring reps until it is.
There's a whole other post about this, because it turns out belugas really can recognize themselves in a mirror (real 2026 study, not cope). The short version: #013 looked in the mirror and saw a champion.
And then one day the mirror catches up. In the "Campeón" piece he's in a ring set up right on the sand at sunset, gloves in the air, belt on, a #13 medallion on the chain, confetti everywhere, and the whole ocean in the crowd: turtles, octopuses, a sea of fish, a "¡Vamos Boricua!" sign. Everybody showed up.
Nobody wins alone. Not even the bad boy.
Why 13
13 is my lucky number. It always has been.
Most people treat 13 like bad luck. Elevators skip it. Hotels skip it. And honestly, that's why I like it. It's the number everybody wrote off, which makes it the perfect number for an underdog.
So #013 got the number, he got revealed on the 13th, and he got my whole personality. Fair trade. 😭
Why he isn't for sale
Every other beluga is a gift, an invite or a public mint. #013 comes out of the Founder Invites like the gifts do, except this one goes to me, and he stays there.
He's the reminder. On days when the chart is red and the followers aren't moving and I'm wondering why I'm drawing whales at 2am, I look at this dumb beautiful beluga in his shades and remember: you got up once. Get up again.
Join his corner
He's not for sale, but the rest of the pod is. 100 one-of-ones, #000 to #099, neon line art plus a cartoon edition, at BigBelugas.com.
- Chain: [CHAIN]
- Mint: [DATE]
- Price: [PRICE]
- Invites: DM @NftRaffi and tell me which beluga you'd want and why.
One official link, bigbelugas.com. I never DM first. Never share your seed phrase, not even with a beluga in a suit.
Gloves up. Still building. 🥊🐋🤍
Raffi
Want in? DM @NftRaffi on X for an invite, then go meet the pod.